Told Girl to Come See Me Again No Answer
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A guy has asked you out, or y'all know that he's planning to. It's hard to say the right affair, peculiarly if you've never been in this situation before! Whether your answer is 100% "Yep!", absolutely "No.", or a definite "Maybe," you might be wondering what exactly you should say to him. Don't worry—this article breaks down all of the different things you tin can say depending on what your answer is.
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1
Make sure that y'all like this guy. Inquire yourself whether you are actually interested in this guy, or if you're simply flattered that he took an interest in you. If you lot impact base with your feelings and find that you're a wholehearted "Yes!!" on this guy, then feel free to take his offering. If yous're lukewarm about him, simply you feel bad saying no, consider whether it will be easier to turn down him now or afterwards.[1]
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Find out what he expects from you. Some guys will inquire you lot out on a outset date to a park, a trip the light fantastic, or the movies just to spend time with yous and get to know you better.[2] Especially if you're in uncomplicated school, middle school, or high schoolhouse, guys might enquire you to be their girlfriend without arranging a "date". This could mean that he wants to eat lunch together, or walk home together, or concord easily, or more. Some guys might just inquire yous to exist their engagement to a dance or another event.
- Don't be agape to inquire him what he means. If you like him, but he isn't clear about what he wants from you lot, it is completely your identify to inquire further. If he says something every bit vague every bit, "Will yous become out with me?", you tin can say, "Sure! What did y'all have in mind?"
- If it's a group outcome, make certain that he is inviting yous explicitly equally his "date". If he invites yous along with him and his friends, information technology probably means that he likes you lot, just information technology doesn't necessarily mean that he's request you lot to be his girlfriend yet. It might be a manner for him to get to know you lot better, or to gauge whether you like him back before he makes a big move.
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Say yes. Your verbal response depends on his question. Remember about what exactly he is asking you to practice, and have his request if yous experience comfortable with information technology. You tin can say something like:
- "Yep, I'd love to."
- "Definitely, that sounds great!"
- "Yes, it'south a date!"
- "Of course I would."
- "Sure, what do you want to do?"
- "That sounds fun!"
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Become the details. If the guy asks you out on a commencement appointment, make certain that you go the fourth dimension and place. Figure out whether he is going to selection you up, or whether he plans to encounter y'all there. Find out if information technology's a group event or just the ii of y'all. Brand sure that you're available on that day, at that time, and that y'all don't accept whatever prior plans.
- You lot don't need to get the details before you say aye. The point isn't the event – it's that this guy wants to spend time with you lot. If you want to spend time with him, simply concur to go to the event, and piece of work out the details later.
- Don't be afraid to reschedule if yous have a disharmonize. If you really want to show him that yous're interested, offer an culling. Say, "I'd love to get to the movie with yous, but I'm going to a friend's birthday party on Friday night. Could nosotros become on Saturday instead?"
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Explain your reasons for maxim no. Exist honest. You don't need to over-justify your decision; it is enough if you simply aren't attracted to this guy. Yous may be attracted to the guy, but yous tin can't accept his offer for some reason – maybe your friend likes him, or your parents won't let you date, or you don't feel that you're gear up for a relationship. No affair the situation, information technology'due south important that you are honest with this guy and with yourself.[3]
- If you aren't attracted to the guy, that's all you need to say. Don't be mean almost it, and don't insult him. Say, "I like our friendship, simply I'm non attracted to you lot in that way."
- If your friend likes him, do not spill the secret – unless your friend says that it's okay. Just tell the guy that you aren't interested, and don't hint that in that location is whatever other reason behind your pick.
- If your parents won't let yous date, experience free to be honest with the guy. Exist careful, yet, well-nigh leading him on or giving him hope. If y'all tell him that you lot accept a huge crush on him, simply that you tin't date him, yous may not stop his advances.
- If you don't feel that you're ready for a relationship, that's okay. You volition find someone in your own time, and it will exist then much better if your entire heart is in information technology. This guy might exist the first one to ask you out, merely he won't be the terminal.[4]
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Be clear and straightforward. Don't make excuses, and don't hold to go on a appointment just to exist nice. No doubtfulness, he'd prefer a "yes" over a "no" – but odds are that he'd rather deal with an immediate rejection than strength y'all to get on a compassion-engagement.
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Be quick well-nigh it. Say something elementary like, "I'm sorry, merely I don't similar you in that mode." You don't need to explain in great detail why you aren't interested; you lot only demand to get the chief idea across. Try not to humiliate him with a long, drawn-out speech.
- If he asks for specific reasons, feel free to explicate why you lot aren't interested. Make sure that you don't let it go a debate, and don't let him talk you into going out with him. Be firm and clear. Do non compromise.
- If y'all are friends with the guy, you tin can cite this as a reason. Say, "I love our friendship, but I'm non romantically attracted to y'all. Tin can we keep our friendship how information technology is?"
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Take your fourth dimension to think it over. If you aren't certain, or if you haven't had much dating experience, yous might not be able to give this guy a solid yep or no respond right away. Tell him that you need to recall about information technology, but that you lot'll give him a definite answer in the next few days. Try not to keep him guessing for likewise long – if he really likes you lot, he'll exist anxiously awaiting your reply.[v]
- Make sure that you requite him some sort of reply, even if you only explicate why you can't give him a more definite answer notwithstanding. Information technology takes courage to inquire out someone that you lot really similar, and the least you can do is acknowledge that you're thinking nearly it. This is especially important if he asks yous out via text, email, or instant messaging: if you don't respond, he will take nothing to do but speculate![6]
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Ask your friends and family unit for communication. Make sure to only inquire people that y'all trust. Draw the situation, explain why yous aren't certain, and counterbalance out the pros and cons of saying yes or no. Call up: yous don't demand to take anyone's advice, but it might help you lot improve understand your own feelings. If yous don't feel comfortable asking anyone, make a list of the pros and cons and try to decide on your own.
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Give the guy a articulate answer. Try to make your response as close as possible to "yes" or "no", particularly if it's conditional. Once you've idea through your pick, get the guy one-on-one and tell him what you've decided. If you lot can't get him solitary contiguous, transport him a text or an instant message.
- You don't need to explain your thought process, especially if had major qualms about going out with this guy. If you're comfortable doing and then, however, information technology might assistance the guy understand why you took and then long to answer him.
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Have the fourth dimension to get to know him ameliorate. At that place's no rush. You don't demand to date him right this instant; if he respects you, he'll be patient and wait until you feel comfortable.[seven]
- Tell him, "I like you, simply I want to go to know you better earlier I commit to a human relationship. Permit's hang out equally friends and see what happens."
- If y'all want to say yes, just are not ready to take a human relationship nonetheless, y'all could say "I want to date you. I want to hold your hand. I want to kiss you, just I don't think I'm gear up for a human relationship nevertheless." Give him a small peck on the cheek to prove you mean it.
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Question
Is it OK if I don't respond him right away?
John Keegan is a dating bus and motivational speaker based in New York City. He runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to assistance people find dearest. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.
Dating Omnibus
Expert Reply
Totally! You lot don't have to rush anything if you aren't ready, and there's nothing incorrect with telling him you lot need to think about it for a flake.
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Question
I asked a girl out and she said she'll call up about information technology merely she hasn't responded. Should I ask again?
John Keegan is a dating coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. He runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Wellness.
Dating Charabanc
Expert Reply
Absolutely not. Give her time to remember it over and she'll get back to you. If she doesn't, let it go. In that location are e'er other fish in the sea!
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Article Summary X
Information technology can be tough to know how to answer when a guy asks yous out, but there's no need to stress if you stay true to your feelings. To purchase some time, try asking him what kind of date he has in listen. If you lot're still not sure how to respond, don't be afraid to say that you lot demand a little fourth dimension to recall about it. Later on you've taken some time, give him an answer that clearly indicates "yes" or "no." If you lot have complicated feelings or desire to accept it slow, say something like, "I want to date y'all, but I don't think I'chiliad ready for a relationship nonetheless." However, if y'all decide to say yes, simply grinning and say, "Yeah, I'd love to," then schedule your date. For more advice, including how to say no to a date, read on.
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